“Go Rib or Go Home”
Maeli Aguilar-Alvarez fully believes in going big or going home. The 26-year-old was spotted by a cop leaving Rines Market IGA grocery store in Indiantown, Florida. What really caught top police officer’s eye? Aguilar-Alvarez pulled a full rack of ribs from his pants.
A further search yielded two packs of hamburger buns, nine pieces of fried chicken and some mashed potatoes, all of which Maeli stole. Probably not surprisingly, the hungry crook reportedly smelled of booze and was intoxicated while dealing with police.
Aguilar-Alvarez has been hit with a retail theft charge.
“Dead Asleep”
Gonzalo Montoya Jiménez gave morgue employees in Spain a real scare when all of sudden he started snoring. The problem? The 29-year-old had been declared dead by three different doctors.
The man was an inmate at a jail in the Asturias region and it was there a guard first discovered him – appearing to show no signs of life. More than three hours later, and only a few minutes before his autopsy, Jiménez started snoring in his body bag.
Workers helped him to his feet and now Jimenez is under observation at a nearby hospital. Doctors believe he was suffering from Catalepsy, a condition characterized by a very weak pulse and serious muscular rigidity.
OFFBEAT NEWS QUICKIES:
- Remember the elderly couple caught with marijuana they claimed were Christmas presents? Well, they’ve been arrested yet again.
- Jamie Lee Curtis has been arrested. No, not that Jamie Lee Curtis. This Pennsylvania man led cops on a chase in a stolen truck that he later crashed.
- A young moose got stranded in the feet of snow that fell in Crouseville, Maine. Cue the nine good Samaritans who grabbed their shovels and rescued the animal.
STUPID CRIMINALS:
“Über Stupid”
New Orleans authorities arrested a couple on Saturday night after they attempted to rob an Uber driver. The victim reported a woman, whom he had met and given his number to after a prior Uber ride, after she invited him to come over and the following transpired: When he arrived, the woman was topless in an attempt to seduce the driver, while her boyfriend robbed him at knife point. When met with resistance, the boyfriend ran off, but was eventually located by police via search dogs and was subsequently bitten by one of the dogs after refusing to come out of hiding.
“Elderly Eluding”
Age is but a number for the 80-year-old Swiss man who has been arrested for masked bank robbery. It’s unclear how much money he stole, but a photo of the man was released showing him in the mask holding a blue plastic bag of money before fleeing on foot.
“Gun Safety for Criminals”
If you’re going to go into a life of crime, you really shouldn’t be trigger happy. A trio of men broke into an apartment when one accidentally shot himself. According to Fairfax County, Virginia police, the wounded robber had an unintentional, self-inflicted wound to the lower body. Police say the three robbers fled the scene but it’s not sure if they stole anything.
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