'OFFBEAT NEWS' FOR DECEMBER 15TH

‘Offbeat News’ for December 15th

OFFBEAT NEWS:

Stormy the cow might be an atheist. The bovine is a part of the Old City neighborhood of Philadelphia’s annual live nativity scene. This year, however, the show cow had enough.
First, she escaped and was spotted alongside Interstate 95. After being corralled and brought back, she escaped for a second time and was found hanging out in a nearby parking structure.

Understandably, authorities didn’t want to have deal with a third escape, so they replaced Stormy with Ginger the cow. The live nativity scene, which also features a donkey, sheep and goats, runs through December 27th.


Artist Dieter M. Weidenbach walked in to his Thüringen, Germany studio to find it ransacked. Naturally, he thought it was a group of vandals. It turns out it was one creature behind the destruction, and Dieter caught him red handed…or red pawed.

It turns out a raccoon had gotten into the studio and left a wake of destruction in its path, then sat atop one of the ceiling beams. “He looked at me calmly with his cute eyes. He had a beautiful coat,” Dieter remembers. “But I was so angry”
That’s understandable considering the raccoon ruined $35-hundred worth of supplies and 40 works of art.


Who needs a dog or a cat when you can have a mini cow? Dustin Pillard has been raising and selling mini cows for 25 years and according to him, they make great pets.

They stand three-feet-tall and weigh a quarter of what full-grown bulls weigh. “Many of them have personalities like a dog,” Pillard explains. “They run around like a dog, they like people and are calm and sociable. They also love attention. It is hard not to fall in love with a little mini calf that barely comes up to your knees.”

Pillard claims the mini cows are totally healthy, just, well, miniature.


STUPID CRIMINALS:

Police in Seattle were called to a restaurant after a woman called 911 to complain about staff calling her names and shouting. After they arrived and did some investigating, staff told them it was the woman who was causing a scene and all over what she considering to be not enough Sriracha sauce with her pizza. The only person charged, however, was a 29-year-old who threw a garbage can at the the unnamed woman’s male companion. It’s unclear what caused that outburst.

Creio Chance Bishop didn’t want his girlfriend, McKayla Biedenbach, to continue stripping at JB’s Gentlemen’s Club in Huntington, West Virginia. Naturally the only thing 21-year-old Bishop could do was light the place on fire. He didn’t try and hide that he was the arsonist, either. Bishop allegedly watched the fire burn from a parking lot across the street and even yelled at a passerby to mind his own business when the witness appeared to be dialing 911. Sure enough, police arrested him in that same parking lot. The fire only caused minimal damage and no injuries. No word on if McKayala is continuing to work at JB’s, but Creio is now facing a second-degree arson charge.

Randy Bolstad is not exactly a criminal mastermind. The La Crosse, Wisconsin man called 911 to say he lost his money inside a locked building, but didn’t mention how he’d managed to get in it in the first place. Police responded after he’d threaten to break in to get his money, but Bolstad was nowhere to be found. The next day, cops responded to that same building after someone reported their laptop was stolen. That’s when police found probation paperwork for Bolstad in a bathroom trash can. Officers eventually found Bolstad walking without shoes on, and when questioned about the theft, he said “I choose death.” Instead, cops hit him with one count of burglary.

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